Embracing diverse holidays and celebrations
As the festive holidays approach, Bristol Wellbeing College tutor Jasmine takes a look at different ways to feel fulfilled and find connection.
As the bells of Christmas ring earlier and earlier each year, the event itself and the ever growing run up to the day can come with a myriad of emotions.
Consumer marketing tells us ‘it’s the most wonderful time of the year’ and although the winter holidays can present more opportunities for connection, a deliciously rich diet and sparkles, it’s also a time that can highlight what’s lacking in our lives.
In 2022 UK statistics recorded an estimated:
- 1 in 3 families are blended (families with children from different relationships)
- 8.3 million people live alone
- 2.9 million are in lone parent families
- 14.4 million people are living in poverty.
As society opens up to accept and welcome diversity in all its beautiful forms, we also need to remodel the traditional concepts and ideas of holidays that no longer fit the diverse, blended, independent, isolated, financially broke, unconventional, disadvantaged and rebellious among us.
Let the sun shine on an inclusive Christmas! (Don’t worry – you can still wish for snow!)
Diverse holidays
Although Christmas dominates the airwaves in terms of the holiday that we widely hear about, many of us have different celebrations.
Kwanzaa is celebrated from 26 Dec to 1 Jan. Millions of people celebrate their African roots, collectively dedicating these days to principles that build strength in self and community, while honouring their ancestors.
Hanukkah, which is celebrated from 7 to 15 December, is a Jewish eight-day festival. Parents website describes it beautifully – “Hanukkah” means dedication in Hebrew, and the Jewish holiday, also known as The Festival of Lights, represents joy. It’s punctuated by an eight-night display of dancing flames atop candles held in intricate menorahs, conveying warmth, comfort, and a miracle.” Read the full article.
Feeling fulfilled
To increase common humanity and connection to others it is important to realise that the reality of others’ experience doesn’t often match our perception.
Many of us will experience challenges and delights at Christmas. Variants and disparities of environments, connections, and stability don’t exclude people from stress, sadness or joy, or any of the other 24 categories of emotion!
When we present one cultural ideal those outside of it feel excluded, so let’s expand the visions of Christmas to meet people in every corner of society.
In the past I have chosen a solo Christmas. Waking, cooking and dishing out mounds of breakfast sandwiches on Christmas morning while having chats with rough sleepers was one of my most favoured festive memories. You don’t have to give up your lie- in or be out in the cold to get that sense of fulfilment. Indoor volunteering opportunities are plentiful. Caring at Christmas run a winter shelter and food service, they have biscuits for days and a welcoming team to become part of. The Marmalade Trust seeks drivers and companions, and you get a free dinner! Your local community centre may also be hosting events you could get involved in.
If you want more opportunities to wear your festive jumper in the run up to the holidays, Aid Box Community needs volunteers to sell and deliver Christmas trees. FareShare needs people for food collections.
Equally, the winter holidays are the perfect time to fill your own cup and it may be that sometimes the most positive action is inaction. A chance to wear pyjamas all day, have chocolate for breakfast, and watch three cheesy films by lunchtime.
Christmas on a budget
Looking into an empty purse in December can understandably create a worry cloud, as consumer expectations are high. But who says that an enjoyable day must have piles of presents, three courses and mini snacks? The retail industry may have hijacked our holidays, so try to remember feelings create memories not things.
This is a time where the pinch can cause panic. If you or anyone you know is worrying about how to provide gifts for children, teenagers or older people, Salvation Army is doing the work of the North Pole, providing gifts without judgement or expectation of mince pies in return.
Even on a budget, no one wants to deny themselves edible treats, food is a part of our celebrations. If you can hold out for non-essentials, shopping on Christmas Eve, just before closing time and early Boxing Day can be fruitful, as desirable goodies are often reduced.
Budgets and connection can also be supported by having lunch in the community. Super Supper Club at Easton Community centre, and Shirehampton JTE Hub offers a free Christmas dinner for those in need. Get in touch in advance for a space. Foodbanks are stocking up for the winter surge now. It can feel difficult to reach out, but help is there if you need it.
Self-care
December can be a time where we feel a greater responsibility for the emotions of others. Loved ones may look to us to materialise a movie-worthy time, complete with a visit from Father Christmas. For many of us giving our energy to others may feel natural, even when exhausting. Self-care is the purposeful act of taking care of your body, mind and soul. Although it may feel self-indulgent if unfamiliar, it is a tool for your wellbeing. Don’t forget to carve out time for you, to do whatever makes you feel recharged.
Our experience of anything in life is informed by our perception. If we can set an intention to look after ourselves when holding difficult emotions or relish the opportunity to practise compassion or reframe our experience by practising gratitude, we have opportunity to create a little shift.
This year I am heading to Calais to be part of a food service called Refugee Community Kitchen. Tapping out of traditional Christmas altogether is a hard choice to make, but a valid one. Many curry houses are open on Christmas Day…
Otherwise, Caring at Christmas need help at Trinity over the Christmas period and Marmalade Trust have some spaces left for drivers and doorstep companions. Refutrees are looking for volunteers Somewhere To Go in Weston-super-Mare offers daily lunches for vulnerable people and Christmas day is no exception. You can join the community for food and support without having to book. If you need a place to sleep they are opening a temporary night shelter over the holiday period.
My colleague Terry Starr uploads a helpful shutdown sheet on our website mid-December for crisis support over Christmas week. He also recommends a musical morning on the big day, joining Pat and Sheerie on BCFM Radio (93.2 FM and DAB) from 7am, for a reggae/soul breakfast! And planning your film schedule for free with UK Christmas TV.
Happy Christmas. I hope it serves you in some way, however it looks.
Please note – Volunteering registration and training starts in autumn, so some services may soon be at capacity, so do get in touch soon if you want to seek volunteering for this year.
If you’d like to find out more about Bristol Wellbeing College courses, head over to our website.