Sowing the seeds of friendship – how farm visits help men’s mental health

A cup of tea, a chat, a bit of fresh air. But would you know where to find it? This Time to Talk Day we visited The Countrymen, just one of hundreds of small community groups that bring men together to connect on a regular basis. Here, we talk to Sharpy, who started going to the club a year ago.  

Driving along mile after mile of winding country roads, it can feel like you might never get to the Countrymen, whose base sits on the border of Somerset and Dorset. Yet, as soon as you reach the driveway, you know this must be the place. Being a farm, it is a hive of activity, however it is the people as much as the animals that give this place a special atmosphere. A blend of volunteers and guests who all work together to find friendship, connection and purpose in the middle of the countryside.  

Combating social isolation

The aim of the group is to use the farm environment to help men who may find themselves isolated because of deteriorating physical or mental health or by changing social circumstances. Many will already have an affinity with farms, gardens or other outdoor environments through their previous work or just a love of the countryside. At Countrymen they are encouraged to put their skills to good use and work and socialise alongside each other.  

‘I suffer a few physical ailments,’ says Brian Sharp (affectionately known as Sharpy) from Yeovil who started attending the club a year ago. ‘Hip problems and back problems, which affected my mobility which in turn affected me mentally. Mentally probably more than the physical side.  

‘I couldn’t find anywhere suitable to sort of go. I’m not a big gathering person. I just like small, so the conventional sort of club doesn’t work for me. I ended up coming out here and trying it and that was over 12 months ago. All my confidence had gone. My self-confidence was nil. But here is a truly funny mix.’ 

Sharpy used to keep pigs and admits that his true love is horses, so enjoyed the opportunity to go and see the animals at the farm and either give them a scratch or feed them. The staff and volunteers support the men who have physical challenges by arranging a range of suitable activities, whether that is helping to chop up vegetables for the animals, planting seeds in the allotment or getting on with some woodwork. And then there is the chance to sit and have a cup of tea, a laugh and even a spot of bingo with Sharpy learning to be a bingo caller.  

‘I feel fulfilled when I leave here,’ he says. ‘I feel better in myself, feel that I’ve had a good laugh and a bit of fun for myself, but also that I’ve maybe done a few good turns.’ 

Finding a sense of purpose

Steve Green works at Countrymen and says that the mix of men from different backgrounds – farming and ex-military but also those from more white-collar environments as well – means that there are a variety of viewpoints available at each session, which makes the group a fun place to be. The chance to work on projects that need practical skills also helps to improve confidence and a sense of purpose.  

‘Coming here is just a great way of forgetting the problems that they have and realising the things that they can do rather than what they can’t. It is literally like getting back to work or getting back to being you, which is one of our catchphrases. It’s about taking men back to life as it as it was.’ 

Connecting with others

At Stepladder we believe connecting with others is a key step to improving your mental wellbeing. There are plenty of clubs and groups in Somerset that can help you find likeminded people; you just have to turn up. Visit our interactive map, which shows lots of groups in the local area. For more information on the Countrymen please visit their website.